8 Ways to Make a Strong Decision Together

By Communication 6 Comments

Getting married triggers many major shifts in your world. Married life looks a lot different than single life; now, instead of being the sole master of your own universe, you’re sharing that space with your soul mate. The two of you must learn, together, how to navigate life as a team. One area of life that changes drastically–and can quickly become very volatile–is that of decision-making. Putting two heads together in order to reach a joint decision that works for both of you can be daunting, particularly if you don’t see eye-to-eye. Decision-making in marriage is often challenging, but it…

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Please Help Me NOT Marry [a Man Like] My Dad

By In-laws & Family, Self Reflection No Comments

People Say We Marry Someone Like Our Mother/Father. Yikes! How Do I Turn Off That Instinct? It’s said that we are attracted to people like our parents… that a woman will be attracted to a man like her father, and a man to a woman like his mother. Many clients come to us and say, “But, yikes! What if I don’t want that?” In a world where parental relationships are often unhealthy, it’s normal for people to fear marrying a spouse like one of their parents. In this video, we talk about the human tendency to be attracted to people…

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7 Dangers of Social Media On Marriage

By Communication, Conflict, Time No Comments

Without question, the prevalence of social media has changed the way our society communicates. We spend our time locked into a screen, we give and receive affirmation through the click of a button, and we have a larger sphere of connection than ever before. Technology’s influence on society is deeper and wider than at any other time in history, and so it’s a given that its influence will touch the marriage relationship, as well. It’s important to know the potential pitfalls of social media on a marriage so that a couple can be diligent in avoiding them together. Below we’ll…

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A Battle for His Time: Sports Versus Marriage

By Communication, Conflict One Comment

My Husband Spends the Majority of his Time Involved in Sports. Do I need to change, or does he? So you’re married to a sports nut, and it’s causing division in your relationship. Should your spouse change his (or her!) ways, or should you? In this video, we suggest adjustments, compromises, and possible boundaries to implement in order to bring more harmony to your marriage. Are you married to a sports fanatic? What are some things you have done to bring harmony to your marriage? Have you become involved in your spouse’s sports interest in order to cultivate shared time…

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6 Things To Do When Happiness Fades in Your Marriage

By Conflict, Self Reflection 91 Comments

You’ve begun to feel unhappy in your marriage. You and your spouse haven’t been spending time together like you used to. There’s distance between the two of you, and your interactions have cooled. As blissfully happy as you were when you got married, you can’t imagine how you got to this point. This is supposed to be your soulmate, right? So what is going on? Do you even know this person any more? Long before we ever get married, we imagine that once we’re in a marriage with our soulmate, that person will meet our every need. But that’s not…

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Value Clash: When In-Laws Cause Conflict

By Communication, Conflict, In-laws & Family No Comments

In-Laws: What Do I Do When My Spouse Acts Differently With His/Her Parents? It’s common for married couples to experience conflict when their values clash with those of one or both sets of in-laws, and especially if one spouse is prone to falling in line with his or her family members when they are together. In this video, we address the need for spouses to communicate authentically and empathically when facing conflict involving their in-laws. Does your spouse behave differently when he or she is spending time with his or her family of origin? What are some constructive techniques you have…

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5 Tips for Fighting Well With Your Spouse

By Conflict, Self Reflection No Comments

Conflict is such an important part of the marriage relationship, and it’s unavoidable. It is the price we pay for a deeper level of intimacy. Fighting a good fight can bring you closer together as partners–you’ll walk through some troubled times together and come out on the other side, more connected than ever. Here are five tips to help you effectively navigate conflict in your marriage and learn how to fight well. 1. Don’t View Conflict as a Red Flag How often you fight or what you fight about has no correlation to the likelihood of divorce. Frequency of conflict…

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Marriage and Privacy – Can they Coexist?

By Conflict, Time No Comments

I am a newlywed and I’m not used to the lack of privacy. Does he need to allow my privacy? Marriage introduces a number of major changes in the life of the newlywed–not the least of which is a newfound lack of privacy. In this video, Drs. Les and Leslie discuss the transition from single to married life in terms of privacy, including ideas to help newlywed couples logistically handle giving one another their personal space. Did marriage alter your definition of personal space? How have you and your spouse adapted to shared living quarters, and do you allow one…

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5 Things You Need To Know Before You Get Married

By Communication, Conflict No Comments

Marriage is the most sacred relationship we can enter into. It is ordained by God, and is the oldest institution. It is spoken of throughout the Bible, and is sacred in every way. But it isn’t always easy, and you will never have all the answers. Couples often enter into marriage with rose-colored glasses. When two very different, and admittedly selfish, people join together until death do us part, it can be hard to see exactly what problems could arise. There are five things I wish I knew before I got married, and I want to share them with you….

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How to Create Intimacy in Marriage In Spite of Your Past

By Communication, Conflict No Comments

My husband has more sexual experience than me. I always wonder if I measure up. HELP! Having a spouse who engaged in sexual activity with someone other than you prior to your marriage can create anxiety, discomfort, and distance in your relationship. Likewise, past sexual experiences with individuals other than your spouse can generate guilt, shame, and a toxic environment in your marriage. In this video, Drs. Les and Leslie talk about the importance of leaving the past behind and creating an intimate marriage based in the here and now where both spouses can thrive. If your spouse is more…

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