5 Tips for Fighting Well With Your Spouse

By Conflict, Self Reflection No Comments

Conflict is such an important part of the marriage relationship, and it’s unavoidable. It is the price we pay for a deeper level of intimacy. Fighting a good fight can bring you closer together as partners–you’ll walk through some troubled times together and come out on the other side, more connected than ever. Here are five tips to help you effectively navigate conflict in your marriage and learn how to fight well. 1. Don’t View Conflict as a Red Flag How often you fight or what you fight about has no correlation to the likelihood of divorce. Frequency of conflict…

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Marriage and Privacy – Can they Coexist?

By Conflict, Time No Comments

I am a newlywed and I’m not used to the lack of privacy. Does he need to allow my privacy? Marriage introduces a number of major changes in the life of the newlywed–not the least of which is a newfound lack of privacy. In this video, Drs. Les and Leslie discuss the transition from single to married life in terms of privacy, including ideas to help newlywed couples logistically handle giving one another their personal space. Did marriage alter your definition of personal space? How have you and your spouse adapted to shared living quarters, and do you allow one…

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5 Things You Need To Know Before You Get Married

By Communication, Conflict No Comments

Marriage is the most sacred relationship we can enter into. It is ordained by God, and is the oldest institution. It is spoken of throughout the Bible, and is sacred in every way. But it isn’t always easy, and you will never have all the answers. Couples often enter into marriage with rose-colored glasses. When two very different, and admittedly selfish, people join together until death do us part, it can be hard to see exactly what problems could arise. There are five things I wish I knew before I got married, and I want to share them with you….

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How to Create Intimacy in Marriage In Spite of Your Past

By Communication, Conflict No Comments

My husband has more sexual experience than me. I always wonder if I measure up. HELP! Having a spouse who engaged in sexual activity with someone other than you prior to your marriage can create anxiety, discomfort, and distance in your relationship. Likewise, past sexual experiences with individuals other than your spouse can generate guilt, shame, and a toxic environment in your marriage. In this video, Drs. Les and Leslie talk about the importance of leaving the past behind and creating an intimate marriage based in the here and now where both spouses can thrive. If your spouse is more…

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4 Tips for Choosing Wise Friendships In Your Marriage

By Communication, Time 8 Comments

Friendship is a gift. We need our friends, and that need doesn’t come to an end when we get married. Here you’ll find tips for choosing wise friendships that will enrich your marriage, as well as balancing the intimacy in your marriage with the important friendships in your lives. 1. Make Past Friends Part of Your Shared Life When you get married, the landscape of your relationships changes. There are many adjustments to make because it becomes impossible to cultivate your marriage while supporting the same time investment you put into past friendships. While there’s nothing wrong with each of…

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Once a Cheater, Always a Cheater?

By Conflict One Comment

Is the saying “Once a cheater, always a cheater,” true? In today’s video, Drs. Les and Leslie tackle the accuracy of the saying, “Once a cheater, always a cheater.” They provide hurting spouses with potential ways to protect themselves as they attempt to salvage their marriages, and to discern whether the offending spouse is sincere in his or her efforts to change past behaviors and build a healthier relationship. If your spouse had an affair in the past, was your relationship successfully reconciled? What boundaries did you set, and how did your spouse hold himself or herself accountable for past…

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Are Your Hearing Aids Working?

By Communication, Self Reflection No Comments

Five Ways To Become A Better Listener In Your Marriage Ask any married person for a list of what makes a healthy marriage, and communication will always be in the top five. Ask that same person about a time when their marriage has broken down and high atop their list of reasons will be lack of communication. The importance of communication can almost seem overstated, but nonetheless, it’s an issue that arises in every marriage, including ours. We can often forget that healthy communication is not just about talking, but about listening, a trait that seems to be rapidly declining…

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Should I Expect My Wife To Care About Her Looks?

By In-laws & Family, Self Reflection No Comments

Am I wrong to expect my wife to care a little about making herself look nice for me? Advice? During some seasons of marriage–child-rearing, for example–wives often find themselves with less reason or interest to invest energy in their outward appearances. In this video, Drs. Les and Leslie provide suggestions for husbands who want to remain physically attracted to their wives throughout the seasons of marriage, but don’t know how to approach the issue. Husbands, how have you created moments for your wives that allowed them to focus on nurturing their physical appearances, and what were the results? Wives, how…

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11 Questions to Ask Your Spouse to Spark Deeper Conversation

By Communication 5 Comments

All of us, at some point, go through times in our marriages when we find it difficult to create the meaningful conversations that keep intimacy alive. Here you will find 11 questions you can ask your husband or wife on date nights, on road trips, and during tough times that will initiate deeper communication in your relationship. When using questions like these as conversation starters, remember to keep the questions open-ended (don’t ask anything that will elicit only a “yes” or “no” answer), and always follow up. After your spouse has shared his or her thoughts, engage and share your…

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Take a Guilt Free Drop

By Careers No Comments

So now there is no condemnation for those who belong to Christ Jesus. – Romans 8:1 “This morning we are going to learn to juggle. Each of you should be holding three brightly colored scarves.” More than a thousand of us had gathered in the ballroom of a hotel for a conference on laughter. This morning we were listening to Dr. Steve Allen Jr., the son of the famous comedian. “I’m going to lead you through a dozen steps to teach you the fine art of juggling,” he told us. “First, take one of your scarves, hold it out at…

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