Category

Marriage

Four Tips to Alleviate Chore Wars

By | Communication, Conflict, Marriage, Relationships | No Comments

Chores tend to be a frequent and hot source of arguments in relationships. Why? Because chores are there – day in and day out. For many of us, chores aren’t on the top of our to-do list, which makes arguing about household duties an easy thing to do. Couples enter marriage with unconscious expectations, the key is to communicate these expectations and determine together who does what. As your lives grow and get more complicated (children, career shifts, etc.) the household responsibilities become more complicated as well. Chores will never disappear, but your disagreements about them can. Here are four…

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How to Prioritize Time for Your Marriage

By | Marriage, Time | 2 Comments

One of the biggest misbeliefs of time is that you can “find” it. We talk about time as if it’s hidden in the rubble of our attic, or high up on a shelf waiting to be dusted off. Truth is, we will never find time, but we can certainly make it. We can make time when we decide what matters to us most is a priority. Saying something is a priority and actually making it a priority are two very different things. You may say that your marriage comes first, but that doesn’t matter if you devote your time to…

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Five Hazards to Avoid That Affect Happiness

By | Marriage, Relationships, Self Reflection | 6 Comments

Just like a skilled golfer who surveys their course for bunkers and hazards, we need to survey our future. Relationships with your spouse, family and friends will be much smoother if you examine your journey ahead and take note of potential hazards to your happiness. Planning for your future goes far beyond finances and basic means. It should also include a plan for your happiness that avoids any unnecessary bumps in the road. Today, we are exposing five hurdles that can steal your happiness; but only if you let them. 1. Comparing Ourselves to Others The reason comparing ourselves to…

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How to Put Good Communication Into Practice

By | Communication, Marriage | 4 Comments

Let’s face it, communication in marriage can sometimes be tough. Even if we are great communicators, remembering to put our communication tools into practice each day is its own challenge. The follow through on practicing your communication skills effectively is what counts. It comes down to choosing to be a good communicator. Communication roadblocks can feel detrimental in a relationship, but they can be avoided by following a few simple steps. Here are three ways you can intentionally put your communication skills into practice each and every day. 1. Practice fundamentals Going back to basic fundamentals can help with a…

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Two Rules for Cultivating Ownership During a Fight

By | Communication, Conflict, Marriage | 6 Comments

We’ve said it time and time again; good fighters own their proverbial piece of the conflict pie. They know that criticism is for cowards. They are also aware that blame and shame never lead to positive outcomes. Good fighters take a bold step and admit when they’ve made a mistake. In any fight, it’s important to understand that it’s not who is wrong but what is wrong that counts. And good fighters know this. If you are lacking the tools you need to own your piece of the pie, then this post is for you. There are two rules for…

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Speaking Your Spouse’s Spiritual Language

By | Marriage, Self Reflection | 2 Comments

There are a number of equally valid pathways for finding spiritual fulfillment. Not everyone sees or relates to God in the same way. In fact, one of the biggest stumbling blocks to spiritual intimacy in marriage is a failure to understand and appreciate the other’s spiritual language. Don’t expect everyone else’s spiritual walk to be equal to yours. Spirituality isn’t carbon copied to fit everyone identically. There are a wonderful variety of ways to relate to God that are equally compelling. Today, we are discussing nine common spiritual pathways. We have adapted and adjusted these pathways for couples with inspiration…

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How To Support Your Spouse After a Traumatic Event

By | Communication, Marriage | 7 Comments

Those who have gone through a traumatic event can often develop Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). The cause of PTSD varies greatly. It appears different in each person and can be the result of varying factors such as a traffic accident, encountering a life threatening or emotional event, experiencing the loss of a loved one, and so on. It may be hard to detect that your spouse is hurting. Physically they may seem okay, but something is troubled under the waters and deep within them. Often, people who suffer from PTSD don’t know how to connect words with their experience….

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How to Repair a Relationship Damaged by Overcontrol

By | Conflict, Marriage | 7 Comments

“That is the mystery of grace: it never comes too late.” – Francois Mauriac Nothing suffers more from overcontrol than our relationships. Trying to control other people does nothing besides push them away. At the root of all controlling behavior is the desire to control one’s own anxiety. For the controller, it creates peace and calm and a taste of power over everything that seems beyond real control; namely people and time. For “control freaks” compromise doesn’t feel gratifying – a victory does. The result? Relationships are damaged. So how do you repair a relationship you’ve damaged by overcontrol? Every…

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Becoming a Step Parent: How to Ease into Your New Role

By | Communication, Marriage, Parenting | 4 Comments

It’s a gift to enter into a family with kids. The children are blessed to have so much love around them, and your heart is in such a great place to want to be a part of their life. You can never have too much love in a family! In some ways, the children will soak up this new relationship with you and will love having another parental figure in their life. However, there is another part to this equation. Change is sometimes a hard thing, especially for children. Children tend to struggle and show resistance when they are confronted…

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How to Overcome The Silent Treatment

By | Communication, Conflict, Marriage | 3 Comments

The silent treatment. Need we say more? Most of us have experienced this at one time or another – either as the giver or the receiver. Spouses can become out of synch; one is ready to tackle the issue, while the other has completely backed off to the point of silence. Regardless of who is the culprit, the silent treatment can be devastating and may feel like an impossible feud to handle. After all, silence makes no sound – but says so much. So what should you do when your spouse gives you the silent treatment? How should you respond?…

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