How to Grow Together In Your Marriage

By Marriage One Comment

Growth is something we all experience as we go through the seasons of our lives. It’s not unusual to hear married couples talk about how they have changed and evolved as individuals over the years. Allowing ourselves to grow and change as people, in turn, can enrich our marriages. Healthy growth generally involves becoming more mature adults with greater wisdom and life experience. Our growth helps us to step confidently into each phase of life, with valuable lessons we’ve learned in the past. Growing throughout our lives also gives us the chance to impart those lessons to younger generations, including…

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The Intimacy Goals Every Married Couple Should Set

By Intimacy One Comment

A breakdown in intimacy is one of the most difficult challenges therapists, coaches, and clergy face when working with couples. Intimacy embodies the feeling that two spouses know one another more deeply and completely than anyone else. When there is an intimacy deficit in the relationship, the ripple effect impacts communication and raises the couple’s chances of conflict. In order for intimacy to exist, there are two major goals couples must meet consistently over time. When you counsel engaged and married couples, you’ll want to keep these goals in mind. Want to know more? Read on. Communication Skills Good communication…

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Why Personality Makes Every Marriage Unique

By Marriage, Relationships One Comment

In marriage as in life, our personalities come through in our behaviors. By observing how someone behaves, we can get a fairly accurate idea of what their personality is like. Our behaviors are particularly revealing in marriage, when we spend a lot of time together, one-on-one. What’s interesting, though, is that spouses don’t always accurately perceive one another’s personalities, despite the amount of time they spend with each other. Much of our personality plays itself out internally, in ways our spouse will never see. That’s why relationship assessments such as SYMBIS are so incredibly useful in counseling couples. SYMBIS results…

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How Better Awareness Builds a Better Marriage

By Marriage, Relationships No Comments

As a professional who counsels couples, you have likely seen the positive effects self-awareness has on relationships. You also understand the pitfalls of couples who are unaware of how they relate to each other, and how they operate as individuals. Often, spouses who are wounded will perpetuate a cycle of hurt, seemingly unable to take an objective view of the situation. For engaged and married couples, becoming more self-aware leads to a better relationship outcome. That’s because self-awareness cultivates deeper empathy. Let’s dig a little deeper into why this is so important. Marriage Assessments Cultivate Self-Awareness Self-awareness gives couples the…

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4 Romance Myths Couples Should Bust Right Now

By Marriage, Relationships No Comments

Modern marriages typically begin with a romantic relationship. Unlike marriages of the past, which were often arranged for political purposes or financial stability, marriages in the Twenty-First Century revolve around the initial rush a couple experiences while falling in love. Unfortunately, as so many licensed counselors and therapists already know, romance isn’t enough to sustain a marriage. There are many factors at play in a successful marriage besides romance, but today’s engaged and married couples may not understand how prominent those factors are. As the butterflies of engagement and early marriage give way to broken expectations and disillusionment, couples often…

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Help! We Need to Raise Our Income

By Careers, Communication, Marriage, Relationships One Comment

There are many reasons why you and your spouse might want to raise your income. Maybe you’ve recently taken on a new expense, suffered a pay cut or job loss, or you need to save toward a big goal, such as a vacation or a down payment on a house. Whatever the case, you’ve determined that you need more available money. Luckily, there are a number of ways to free up extra money and raise the amount you’re bringing in. It takes teamwork and shared goals, but the two of you can absolutely work together to make more money for…

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5 Affirmations to Empower Your Spouse

By Communication, Intimacy, Marriage, Relationships 2 Comments

Gifting one another with regular affirmations is a wonderful way for spouses to stay close and remind each other of their affection. If you’re not regularly making an effort to affirm your spouse, then it’s time to start now–and it’s never too late. Affirmations can be simple. The key is to be heartfelt and genuine, and to let your spouse know how much you love and admire them. How well you love your spouse, and the effort you invest in them, will make a tremendous impact on the quality of your marriage. Today, we’ve gathered five simple affirmations to help…

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5 Skills to Improve Communication With Your Spouse

By Communication, Marriage 10 Comments

Communication breakdowns are a common issue in many marriages. Some couples struggle with communication more than others do, and this can be due to differences in personality and communication style. However, working to establish clear and effective communication is key to enjoying a happy marriage in the long term. In order to improve communication in your marriage, there are five realms of communication you must each work to strengthen. Let’s jump right in. 1. Information sharing Sharing information involves the ability to clearly and accurately state your thoughts and feelings without losing yourself in emotion or getting off track. Being…

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How to Make Your Marriage Stronger Than Ever

By Marriage, Relationships No Comments

Strengthening your marriage is a goal you and your spouse must focus on for the entirety of your relationship. Over time, making your marriage stronger will take different forms. Your needs as a couple will shift from one season to the next, and many of those needs will be based on your individual personalities and the way you interact with one another. There’s no one-size-fits-all secret to building a strong marriage. The ingredients to success really depend on you, your spouse, and how you approach life as individuals and as a couple. But, that means you must both invest time…

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How Expectations and Magical Thinking Affect Your Spouse

By Communication, Marriage, Relationships 2 Comments

In every marriage, each spouse has their own set of expectations, either spoken or unspoken. These could be regarding the relationship itself, or expectations for one another as individuals. Either way, what we expect of one another can inform much of our relationship, for better or worse. If you and your spouse have experienced conflict over your expectations for one another, you aren’t alone. Expectations go hand-in-hand with something we call magical thinking. In other words, that means making assumptions about one another, rather than seeking the truth from our spouse. Expectations and magical thinking can impact your spouse in…

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