How Adding Value to Others Boosts Your Happiness

By | Recreation, Time | No Comments

“The only real happy people are those who have learned how to serve.” – Rick Warren It’s no secret that when you bring joy to others, you also bring joy to yourself. The notion of kindness leading to happiness is not new. Writers, philosophers, and religious thinkers have made the connection for centuries. Studies today show the same results, that when you serve others, you are infusing happiness into yourself as well. Research reveals that being generous and considerate makes people happy. It’s as simple as that! And when you are able to do this as a couple, it increases…

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Tips for Taking Care of Unfinished Business

By | Communication | 2 Comments

Every marriage needs a little tune-up now and then. Perhaps things aren’t working as smoothly as they once were, and relational residue is building up. When kinks come up in conversations that aren’t resolved, they don’t just disappear. In today’s busy world conversations are often cut off by interrupting kids, work, schedule conflicts, and much more. When you are having an important conversation or a disagreement and don’t resolve the issue at hand, this undoubtedly will become excess weight you carry around. Unfinished business in a relationship is like a song that starts the first few notes and then suddenly…

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How To Support Your Spouse After a Traumatic Event

By | Communication, Marriage | 7 Comments

Those who have gone through a traumatic event can often develop Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). The cause of PTSD varies greatly. It appears different in each person and can be the result of varying factors such as a traffic accident, encountering a life threatening or emotional event, experiencing the loss of a loved one, and so on. It may be hard to detect that your spouse is hurting. Physically they may seem okay, but something is troubled under the waters and deep within them. Often, people who suffer from PTSD don’t know how to connect words with their experience….

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How To Become Independently Whole

By | Self Reflection | 2 Comments

Last week, we discussed two lies that can sabotage a relationship. Believing the lies that you need someone else to complete you is a fairy-tale misconception. Until you have established a sense of self-worth and independent wholeness, true love will likely be on hold. What can you do to become whole on your own, and how do you discover your inner self-worth? Every person’s journey is unique. Undoubtedly, this journey will be tested by your determination – but it can be done! Today, we want to share four steps that will take you far along your path to becoming independently…

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Two Lies That Sabotage Relationships

By | Self Reflection | 7 Comments

Being in a relationship and part of a community helps you discover who you are. While relationships are the path to discovering yourself, they don’t promise the development of a complete self. If you haven’t achieved a solid sense of who you are on your own, then you are likely on a path to believe one of two lies that are guaranteed to sabotage any relationship: 1) I need this person to be complete, and 2) If this person needs me, I’ll be complete. There are no shortcuts to personal growth and wholeness. If you try to complete yourself through…

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How to Repair a Relationship Damaged by Overcontrol

By | Conflict, Marriage | 7 Comments

“That is the mystery of grace: it never comes too late.” – Francois Mauriac Nothing suffers more from overcontrol than our relationships. Trying to control other people does nothing besides push them away. At the root of all controlling behavior is the desire to control one’s own anxiety. For the controller, it creates peace and calm and a taste of power over everything that seems beyond real control; namely people and time. For “control freaks” compromise doesn’t feel gratifying – a victory does. The result? Relationships are damaged. So how do you repair a relationship you’ve damaged by overcontrol? Every…

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Becoming a Step Parent: How to Ease into Your New Role

By | Communication, Marriage, Parenting | 4 Comments

It’s a gift to enter into a family with kids. The children are blessed to have so much love around them, and your heart is in such a great place to want to be a part of their life. You can never have too much love in a family! In some ways, the children will soak up this new relationship with you and will love having another parental figure in their life. However, there is another part to this equation. Change is sometimes a hard thing, especially for children. Children tend to struggle and show resistance when they are confronted…

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How to Overcome The Silent Treatment

By | Communication, Conflict, Marriage | 3 Comments

The silent treatment. Need we say more? Most of us have experienced this at one time or another – either as the giver or the receiver. Spouses can become out of synch; one is ready to tackle the issue, while the other has completely backed off to the point of silence. Regardless of who is the culprit, the silent treatment can be devastating and may feel like an impossible feud to handle. After all, silence makes no sound – but says so much. So what should you do when your spouse gives you the silent treatment? How should you respond?…

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The Importance of Emotional Self-Awareness

By | Communication, Self Reflection | 10 Comments

Controlling one’s emotions is not easy, but it can be done! Self-awareness is the ability to pull back and recognize the feeling you are having. When you have an emotional response and are able to bring it into your awareness, the chances of handling it appropriately improve. You can’t expect your awareness to magically appear, you need to will your awareness. The key is to decide with intention to be objective about your feelings. If you are not aware of your feelings and how to handle them, chances are you may be engulfed, suppressed, or resigned. Today, we are discussing…

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How to Infuse Gratitude into Your Relationship

By | Marriage | 4 Comments

“Let us be grateful to the people who make us happy; they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom.” – Marcel Proust Gratitude is one of the few things in a marriage that can instantly and measurably improve a couple’s relationship. The benefits of gratitude are calculable and act as a booster shot for romance. When you are in a romantic rut, try infusing your relationship with a little gratitude. When you do this, you’ll become more elevated, energized and inspired to love better. So, are you ready to add more gratitude to your relationship? Chances are we…

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