Category

Conflict

5 Things You Need To Know Before You Get Married

By | Communication, Conflict | No Comments

Marriage is the most sacred relationship we can enter into. It is ordained by God, and is the oldest institution. It is spoken of throughout the Bible, and is sacred in every way. But it isn’t always easy, and you will never have all the answers. Couples often enter into marriage with rose-colored glasses. When two very different, and admittedly selfish, people join together until death do us part, it can be hard to see exactly what problems could arise. There are five things I wish I knew before I got married, and I want to share them with you….

Read More

How to Create Intimacy in Marriage In Spite of Your Past

By | Communication, Conflict | No Comments

My husband has more sexual experience than me. I always wonder if I measure up. HELP! Having a spouse who engaged in sexual activity with someone other than you prior to your marriage can create anxiety, discomfort, and distance in your relationship. Likewise, past sexual experiences with individuals other than your spouse can generate guilt, shame, and a toxic environment in your marriage. In this video, Drs. Les and Leslie talk about the importance of leaving the past behind and creating an intimate marriage based in the here and now where both spouses can thrive. If your spouse is more…

Read More

Once a Cheater, Always a Cheater?

By | Conflict | One Comment

Is the saying “Once a cheater, always a cheater,” true? In today’s video, Drs. Les and Leslie tackle the accuracy of the saying, “Once a cheater, always a cheater.” They provide hurting spouses with potential ways to protect themselves as they attempt to salvage their marriages, and to discern whether the offending spouse is sincere in his or her efforts to change past behaviors and build a healthier relationship. If your spouse had an affair in the past, was your relationship successfully reconciled? What boundaries did you set, and how did your spouse hold himself or herself accountable for past…

Read More

How To Keep Conflict From Turning Toxic

By | Conflict | No Comments

Whenever a conflict erupts between us, it eventually ends with one of us checking out, either emotionally or physically leaving the room. This has become a fairly predictable pattern and it seems to get us nowhere. What are we doing wrong? Few things are more destructive to a new marriage than coping with conflict by withdrawing. And since this has become a repetitive way of dealing with your conflict, it is particularly important that you take note of some important research conducted by Dr. John Gottman of the University of Washington. For more than twenty years, he has been studying…

Read More

How To Make Anger Your Ally

By | Conflict | 2 Comments

We are the first to admit it. Both of us are expressive people and when it comes to expressing anger, we don’t hold much back. We’ve kind of come to accept that, but lately, it seems that anger is rearing it’s head a little too often. What do we do if anger is a repetitive problem? Marriage and anger go together. Of course any relationship can generate considerable anger, but a typical marriage relationship often generates more anger than any other. Why? For one reason, the sheer amount of time spent together creates more opportunity for anger to erupt. In…

Read More

Why Conflict Isn’t So Bad

By | Conflict | No Comments

When we were dating we had a fight every now and then, but that pales in comparison to what it’s been like since we’ve been married. I know some couples who say they never fight and that makes me all the more nervous about my marriage. Does having conflicts mean that we will get a divorce? Like you, we have heard some mature couples, married for decades, who say that in all their years of marriage they have never had one single fight. Pretty impressive, huh? But in all honesty, we often wonder about these couples. They seem so proud,…

Read More