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self reflection Archives - Page 3 of 5 - SYMBIS Assessment

How to Become More Approachable Through Humility

By Scripture, Self Reflection 4 Comments

Without a doubt, Jesus was the most approachable person who ever walked the Earth. He was tuned into the people on the fringes–those who were most likely to be outcast and excluded. Jesus was shockingly accessible to everyone, including people who were considered “undesirables”. He certainly wasn’t like the other “holy men” of his time. In fact, His accessibility made them livid. That’s because the rabbis and priests of Jesus’s time operated on principles of isolation and exclusion, holding everyone at arm’s length. In contrast, Jesus welcomed everyone with open arms. The Greek word for approachable is parresia, which means…

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Sexual Experience Before Marriage: Talking With Your Fiance

By Communication, Self Reflection 12 Comments

It’s common for couples to come into marriage with some “baggage” they have to work through. Everyone’s baggage is different, but a situation many engaged couples face involves previous sexual experience. Whether that’s experience with your fiance or an ex, it can add extra emotional weight to your relationship. It can be upsetting to know that one or both of you has sexual history from a previous relationship. If your fiance was in a relationship involving sexual intimacy, it can create self-doubt, anxiety, sadness, and regret. Your sexual history (or your fiance’s) is something that will haunt your forever–but only…

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How to Share More Prayer with Your Spouse

By Communication, Self Reflection, Time 8 Comments

Prayer is an essential part of life as a Christian that connects you to directly to God. Incorporating regular prayer in your marriage is a powerful way to not only deepen your relationship with Him, but also with one another. It’s a tool to increase intimacy and grow spiritually. Life is busy. We understand how difficult it can be to take time for daily prayer on your own–and how much more challenging it is to incorporate your equally-busy spouse into that routine. Luckily, there are several ways the two of you can make more time to pray together, and we’re…

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5 Tips for Loving Others Without Judgment

By Scripture, Self Reflection 7 Comments

Loving like Jesus did requires the ability to extend grace–in other words, to love others without judgment. For most of us, this is much easier said than done. It’s easy to use judgmentalism as a way to mask our own insecurities and elevate ourselves above others. Being judgmental makes us conceited and self-righteous. It’s an addictive delusion that artificially boosts our worth. Never mind the Bible’s words: “Do not judge, or you too will be judged.” This is one hard habit to break. A judgmental, self-righteous attitude prevents us from giving grace. Luckily, it is possible to shed our judgmental…

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Selfishness in Reverse: How to Lovingly Give More of Yourself

By Scripture, Self Reflection 4 Comments

“Selfish people are, by definition, those whose activities are devoted to bringing themselves happiness. Yet, at least as judged by others, these selfish people are far less likely to be happy than those whose efforts are devoted to making others happy.” – Dr. Bernard Rimland, Ph.D. What does it mean to be self-giving? I (Les) like to think of it as selfishness in reverse. It’s a quality we must have if we want to love like Jesus did. Selflessness gives without the expectation of repayment or appreciation. It’s something we extend out of kindness and compassion. It’s easy to get…

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3 Ways to Demonstrate Love Mindfully

By Scripture, Self Reflection 2 Comments

Mindfulness, or attentiveness, is a practice that can be applied to our entire lives to help us be more fully engaged with both ourselves and others. When we fail to be mindful of what’s happening inside and around us, we’re prone to a sort of “perceptual blindness.” This means that we could easily be missing the obvious–especially when it comes to the people we encounter. When we’re too wrapped up in our own activities and to-do lists, we’re missing others’ needs. Then, we leave a gap where we could have provided help, attention, affection, guidance, or love. Loving mindfully is…

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How to Love Like Jesus

By Scripture, Self Reflection 17 Comments

“Observe how Christ loved us. Love like that.” – Ephesians 5:2 Loving like Jesus is the best way to live. When we love like Him, we can step outside ourselves and clearly see our loved ones and their needs. We can shed layers of selfishness, resentment, anxiety, pettiness, and entitlement. Most of all, we can rise above our human imperfections and step into transcendent love. Jesus’s model of love challenges us to stop settling for anything less than “the most excellent way.” If you want to love like Jesus, read on. Can anyone really love like Jesus? When it comes…

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Opposite Sex Friendships: 3 Scenarios and What to Do

By Communication, Conflict, Self Reflection 58 Comments

It can be a challenge to balance the intimacy of our marriages with the other important friendships in our lives. This is especially true if we have close friends of the opposite gender. While same-sex friendships tend to be easy to nurture after we’re married, there’s an entirely different set of considerations when it comes to having opposite-sex friends. The first question to ask ourselves is, where are we going to invest our energy and focus? Obviously, our marriage is the most precious relationship to protect. Outside of that, we have to decide how we’re going to approach our other…

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3 Keys to Finding the Love of Your Life

By Self Reflection 6 Comments

Love is overpowering and intense–a seemingly mystical mix of emotions and physical sensations that authors and poets have compared to madness. If you’ve ever been in love, you know the feelings: lightheadedness, shortness of breath, excitement, and elation. The problem is that love seems to cause people to really lose their minds. The phrase “love is blind” is true; the all-consuming sensory experience of falling in love tends to block our critical thinking. It can become almost impossible to objectively look at ourselves–and the person we’re dating–from the outside in. Simply put, feelings of love can’t tell us anything about…

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Building a Shared Vision in Your Marriage: 3 Questions to Answer

By Communication, Self Reflection, Time 4 Comments

Do you and your spouse set aside time once a year to plan for the next 12 months? Making time together for planning, intention, and strategic thought as you move into the future together will bind you closer together and give you shared goals to work toward as a couple. We’ve found that there’s great value in pausing to talk about the direction you’re headed going forward. The New Year’s celebration might be behind us already, but you don’t have to wait until next January to build a shared vision with your spouse. It’s never too late to dream and…

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