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love talk Archives - SYMBIS Assessment

How Facts vs. Feelings Influence Your Spouse

By Communication, Marriage, Relationships One Comment

In marriage, spouses influence one another significantly–both consciously and unconsciously. Knowing whether your spouse is more influenced by facts or by feelings can add a great deal of productivity to your conversations. We’re all influenced primarily by either facts or feelings. When spouses’ primary points of influence clash, this can lead to difficulties in communication. But when we know the driving force behind one another’s primary influences, we can better anticipate how to communicate successfully. So how do you determine whether your spouse is influenced by feelings or facts? How to Know if Your Spouse is Influenced by Facts People…

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How to Make Memories Together in a Time of Upheaval

By Marriage, Relationships, Time 5 Comments

During at time of upheaval, our lives feel very out of control. It’s very easy to get bogged down by the uncertainty, negativity, and anxiety associated with difficult times–whether economic, health-related, or otherwise. That’s why it’s so important to intentionally make memories together during the hard times. It seems counterintuitive, but working to make happy memories helps you and your spouse find positive things to focus on. Rather than feeling deprived of happy times, you have the power to create them yourself. This can be pivotal for couples and families who are feeling the stress of a difficult time. Today,…

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Passive vs. Aggressive Problem Solvers: Which One Are You?

By Communication, Conflict, Marriage, Relationships, Self Reflection One Comment

Do you tackle problems head-on with a burning desire to resolve them as quickly as possible? Or would you rather take your time processing a conflict before you speak up about it? As a step toward constructive problem-solving, it’s important to identify whether you solve problems in a passive or aggressive manner. The type of problem solver you are can easily damage the sense of emotional safety in your marriage, so it’s important for you both to get familiar with your problem-solving style–and then compare notes. The Passive Problem Solver People who prefer to deal with issues passively are content…

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6 Tips for Connecting When Silence Sets In

By Communication, Marriage, Relationships, Self Reflection No Comments

It’s no exaggeration that non-talkers feel it’s painful to speak when there’s an issue at hand. They silently cry out: “Don’t touch me! Leave me alone.” It’s likely these quiet partners have had their hearts kicked across the floor in the past, and when it comes time to work out issues in their current relationship, it’s easier to clam up and vow to never open up again. They become the silent partner. Yet, deep inside silent partners know that their time for healing will come. If you are a silent partner, or are in a relationship with one, there are…

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How to Put Good Communication Into Practice

By Communication, Marriage 4 Comments

Let’s face it, communication in marriage can sometimes be tough. Even if we are great communicators, remembering to put our communication tools into practice each day is its own challenge. The follow through on practicing your communication skills effectively is what counts. It comes down to choosing to be a good communicator. Communication roadblocks can feel detrimental in a relationship, but they can be avoided by following a few simple steps. Here are three ways you can intentionally put your communication skills into practice each and every day. 1. Practice fundamentals Going back to basic fundamentals can help with a…

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Speaking Your Spouse’s Spiritual Language

By Marriage, Self Reflection 2 Comments

There are a number of equally valid pathways for finding spiritual fulfillment. Not everyone sees or relates to God in the same way. In fact, one of the biggest stumbling blocks to spiritual intimacy in marriage is a failure to understand and appreciate the other’s spiritual language. Don’t expect everyone else’s spiritual walk to be equal to yours. Spirituality isn’t carbon copied to fit everyone identically. There are a wonderful variety of ways to relate to God that are equally compelling. Today, we are discussing nine common spiritual pathways. We have adapted and adjusted these pathways for couples with inspiration…

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The Importance of Spiritual Intimacy

By Communication, Marriage, Scripture, Self Reflection 3 Comments

Spiritual intimacy is one of the most important, yet least talked about aspects of marital health. There are countless studies that show how important it is to share a spiritual bond. This intimacy encompasses your deepest core values, your mission and your passion for life. Spiritual intimacy in a relationship is developed through your activities together, such as attending church. However, it’s also a direct reflection of your journey inside as well. Your spiritual activities are external, while your spiritual values are internal and part of the core of who you are. These go hand in hand. Attending church together…

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Strengthening the Intimacy in Your Relationship

By Communication, Marriage, Scripture 20 Comments

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. – 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 Intimacy is the soul-to-soul and heart-to-heart connection that a couple has between them. It’s the defining moment in a relationship where you truly get each other. However, intimacy is fluid in a marriage. It’s easy to get distracted…

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How to Keep Romance Alive in Your Marriage

By Communication, Marriage 5 Comments

“Kiss me and kiss me again, for your love is sweeter than wine.” —Song of Solomon 1:2 With Valentine’s Day quickly approaching romance is often a topic on our minds. But how do you keep the romance alive after years of marriage? It’s not a surprise that we all go through different seasons of marriage. Some weeks, months, or even years, are harder and less romantic than others. This is normal and can take some work to rekindle the flame, but you can get through it. If you work hard at keeping the romance alive, it will be a game…

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Communication: The Most Important Skill to Have in a Relationship

By Communication 4 Comments

It’s no secret. The most important skill you can have in any relationship, especially a marriage, is communication. Experts agree that if you want to have a healthy relationship you need to learn how to communicate well. Communication is the foundation to getting connected and creating intimacy. And in order to have this intimate connection with your partner, it’s crucial that you have good communication skills. It’s mystifying sometimes when you want to connect, and are ready to, yet your communication suddenly breaks down and you don’t know why. Today we want to discuss two fundamental skills in communication that…

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