Category

Conflict

Jun 18
Love0
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My Spouse Betrayed Me. Is It Fair to Make Them Pay?

By Conflict, Marriage No Comments

Is revenge justified when your spouse betrays you? Whatever happened, this betrayal was devastating to your emotional wellbeing. It affected important aspects of your life and made moving forward incredibly difficult. If your spouse hurt you that deeply, is it fair to make them pay for what they did? Shouldn’t they have to suffer, too? Betrayal is one of life’s most painful experiences. That’s especially true when it happens within a marriage. Some betrayals are easier to overcome than others. Still, they’re all painful enough to make even the kindest, most patient person want revenge. Revenge Won’t Repair Your Heart…

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May 14
Love0
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I Hide Hard Feelings From My Spouse. Can I Avoid Conflict Forever?

By Conflict No Comments

Do you hide hard feelings from your spouse? Many of us prefer to ignore conflict, or have none at all. It’s understandable that you want to keep the peace. Staying silent feels like the safer option when you don’t want to fight with your spouse. The thing is, conflict has its place. When you and your spouse don’t see eye to eye on an issue, it’s going to lead to friction. Avoiding friction completely won’t make it go away. Instead, hiding your hard feelings can create an undercurrent of compounding issues. Avoiding Conflict Makes Problems Worse You might not think…

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May 07
Love0
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My Spouse Guilts Me In Front of Friends and Family. Is That Fair?

By Conflict No Comments

Does your spouse guilt you in front of friends and family? It’s great to have a shared friend group, or to be close with family. There’s comfort and intimacy in close relationships. But sometimes, spouses bring up grievances against each other in these settings. Your spouse might do this in a way that seems lighthearted or well-intentioned to others. To you, though, it feels like an embarrassing guilt trip. Guilt trips can be masked as concern, jokes, or prayer requests. Sometimes they’re an indirect way to air out hard feelings, and are often intended to inspire some kind of change…

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Mar 05
Love0
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Let’s Talk Later: How And When To Pause A Difficult Discussion

By Conflict, Time 2 Comments

How and when should you pause a difficult conversation with your spouse? At one time or another, every married couple will experience a prolonged conflict. At the very least, you’ll face difficult discussions you can’t wrap up in one afternoon. These conflicts and disagreements can come at inconvenient times in your life, when you can’t give your full attention to discussing and resolving them right away. Trying to force conflict resolution can complicate problems, rather than solving them. When you pause difficult discussions, you can come back calmer, and with a clearer perspective. Giving yourselves plenty of breathing room also…

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Feb 26
Love0
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Stability Matters To Me, But My Spouse Isn’t Worried. What Can I Do?

By Careers, Conflict No Comments

So you want stability, but your partner’s not worried. What can you do about that? Stability looks different for different people. For instance, some are concerned with being financially stable. Others want a sense of permanence in the place where they live and raise a family. And others connect the idea of stability with a longstanding job or career path. In some marriages, one partner puts more emphasis on stability than the other. When this happens, it can cause marital stress. Each spouse may have different expectations when it comes to stability, so it’s important to develop empathy for each…

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Feb 05
Love0
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My Spouse Says I Always Keep Score. Who’s Right?

By Conflict, Marriage No Comments

What’s “fair” in marriage? Do you and your spouse keep score? We like to say that scorekeeping is for sports, not for marriage. There’s no scoreboard in your living room, and no referees calling each play. It’s just you and your spouse–and if you’re not playing on the same team, you’re headed for conflict. Do you feel like you’re carrying more than your share of the load in your marriage? If so, how can you find a better balance? Let’s talk about it. Scorekeeping Holds You Both Back Scorekeeping in marriage holds both you and your spouse back. It keeps…

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Dec 04
Love0
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I’m Sick of Getting Stuck in the Middle of Family Fights. What Now?

By Conflict, In-laws & Family No Comments

Do you often get stuck in the middle of family fights? It’s challenging to be pulled into a conflict of any kind, but especially when it’s family. Maybe there’s conflict between your spouse and a family member or disagreements between relatives. Your family trusts you as a mediator or voice of reason, but that might mean you play referee regularly. Getting stuck in a family fight means you feel pressured to pick sides. But when it comes to our own families, we rarely have objectivity. You love the people on both sides of the conflict, you want them to get…

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Nov 13
Love0
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I Want My Spouse To Agree With Me. Is That So Wrong?

By Conflict No Comments

Should spouses agree on everything? When you love someone, you naturally want them to agree with you in all areas. Unfortunately, that’s not realistic. No matter how compatible two people are, they will never align on every issue. It’s normal to crave full agreement from your spouse, especially when it comes to the issues that matter most to you. But when you cross the line from simply desiring agreement to trying to force it, problems can arise in your marriage. If disagreements with your spouse make you feel anxious, keep reading–let’s talk about it. Love Allows for Individuality First, when…

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Sep 18
Love0
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How Do I Keep My Spouse From Staring at the Opposite Sex?

By Conflict, Marriage 2 Comments

Can you stop your spouse from staring at the opposite sex? It’s a pretty common problem among couples: one spouse spots an attractive person, and they have a hard time looking away. What can you do to put a stop to that? Is it even possible? It can feel threatening for our spouse to notice another person’s appearance. But it’s a part of nature. We enjoy beauty, and as humans, we’re going to notice an attractive person from time to time. So how should we handle that? Is It Noticing or Staring? There’s a difference between noticing someone’s appearance and…

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Sep 11
Love0
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My Spouse Cheated, and I Want To Know Why. Is That Too Much to Ask?

By Conflict, Intimacy No Comments

If your spouse has ever cheated, then you know how gut-wrenching infidelity is. You might also know how hard it can be to get your spouse to tell you why they had an affair. In these situations, hearing, “I don’t know why it happened,” is nothing short of frustrating. If you don’t know why an affair happened, is it possible to move forward in your marriage? And is it too much to ask your spouse what led to this? Let’s talk about it. Your Spouse Might Not Deeply Understand Their Affair First, understand that your spouse might not grasp all…

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