All Posts By

Drs. Les and Leslie Parrott

Oct 22
Love0
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Should I Agree to Disagree With My Spouse?

By Conflict No Comments

As a married couple, you’ll inevitably run into situations where you just can’t see eye to eye on a topic. You’re going to think, Man, you just don’t get it. Maybe you’ll exhaust yourself trying to convince them of your perspective. So what do you do in these situations? Should you fight with your spouse when you can’t find common ground? Or should you just agree to disagree and move on? If you and your spouse are struggling with frequent arguments and disagreements, it’s possible to calm the chaos. You Can’t Avoid All Conflict No matter how well you and…

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Oct 15
Love0
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My Spouse Acts Like a Single Person. What Should I Do?

By Marriage No Comments

You’re married, but your spouse still acts single. They spend more time with their friends than with you, and that’s a frustrating position to be in. How can you convince them to prioritize time with you instead? No one wants to experience loss in order to pursue something new, but marriage is a life commitment. The truth is, it’s impossible to cultivate intimacy in your marriage and still support the kind of time you gave your friendships while you were single. You and your spouse don’t have to give up your friends, but making adjustments is essential. If You’re the…

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Oct 08
Love0
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I’ve Fallen Out of “Like” With My Spouse. What Now?

By Marriage One Comment

So you’ve fallen out of “like” with your spouse. What do you do now? Love is such a mysterious experience. It ebbs, flows, and goes through seasons. Married couples sometimes feel they don’t like one another as much as they once did. Even though you love your spouse, it’s possible to dislike things about them. It’s not realistic to expect the full experience of love at all times. That’s because love is made up of many components: respect, companionship, humor, shared experiences, intimacy, and more. In some seasons of life, you may have an imbalance of some of these factors…

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Oct 01
Love0
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How to Ignite Passion in the Second Half of Marriage

By Intimacy No Comments

The second half of marriage is an amazing time in a couple’s life. Many couples find themselves financially secure, with older teenagers or adult children who have moved out. There’s more free time to spend together, along with plenty of opportunities to reconnect and reignite the spark you felt in your early days together. Research tells us that the second half of marriage is the most fulfilling time for committed couples. During the later half of marriage, many couples’ satisfaction begins to rise so high that social scientists no longer have instruments to measure their happiness. We talk about this…

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Sep 24
Love0
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Do You Have the Disease to Please? How to Find Out

By Self Reflection No Comments

“I don’t know how to say no. It’s like I’m incapable of disappointing people!” Does this sound familiar to you? Maybe you’re exhausted, over-extended, and overbooked. Yet when someone needs you, you still can’t bring yourself to refuse. Even if saying yes is to your detriment, you’d rather be agreeable than risk disappointing anyone. We call this the disease to please. When we engage in pathological people-pleasing behavior, we disconnect from our authentic self in order to be approved by others. In a sense, people-pleasers sacrifice who they are. Hard-Wired to Keep People Happy? Do you feel hard-wired to keep…

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Sep 17
Love0
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False Guilt: What Does It Look Like?

By Scripture, Self Reflection No Comments

Do you know what false guilt looks like? Guilt can be lethal on a soul level. It’s brought on by regrets we hold onto, and it comes in many forms. We may feel guilt when we break the law, compromise our integrity, or violate God’s law. These kinds of guilt are justified. On the other hand, false guilt is irrational and unjustified. It tells us we’ve done wrong when we haven’t. It gnaws at us, depriving us of peace. The people who least deserve false guilt are often the ones most plagued by it. Our conscience becomes overactive, insisting we…

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Sep 10
Love0
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How to Build Healthy Self-Awareness

By Self Reflection No Comments

Thinking is tricky business. How we see, think about, and talk to ourselves informs our sense of self. To have a healthier thought life, it’s essential to rebuild our self-awareness on a strong foundation. That begins with thinking true thoughts about ourselves rather than negative ones. In theory, it should be easy to simply change self-defeating, irrational thoughts. Can’t you just decide to stop thinking harmful thoughts? Unfortunately, retraining your brain isn’t quite that straightforward. Suppressing Irrational Thoughts Doesn’t Work When we try to suppress our thoughts, they just become stronger. Scholars refer to this as the ironic process theory….

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Sep 03
Love0
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Why It’s Essential to Banish Your Bad Thoughts

By Scripture, Self Reflection No Comments

Every human struggles with bad thoughts. The truth is, our thoughts either help us or hurt us. There’s no in between. Did you know the brain is the only organ in the human body that governs identity and personality? Over 90% of our wellbeing is directly influenced by the way we think. So when our minds run on autopilot, we unknowingly hand the reins to our “bad thoughts.” The science is straightforward: our thoughts send electrical currents through our brains, which in turn release neurochemicals. These neurochemicals directly influence our moods. Our emotional state influences our everyday habits and decisions….

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Aug 27
Love0
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Our Kids Are Teens, And We’re Having A Baby. What Now?

By Parenting One Comment

So your kids are teens, but surprise! You’re having another baby. What do you do now? A surprise pregnancy can be a bit of a shock, particularly if you and your spouse expected to be empty nesters soon. It’s also a big adjustment for your kids, who are focused on their friends, extracurricular activities, dating, and planning for college. This change is likely creating some chaos inside you, your spouse, your marriage, and your family. We can imagine that this news has created a seismic shift in your world. Maybe you’re reeling internally. You’re in a situation where it’s important…

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Aug 20
Love0
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I Don’t Like My Spouse’s Parenting Style. What Can I Do?

By Parenting No Comments

What do you do when you disagree with your spouse’s approach to parenting? Most of us enter marriage with the awareness that we’ll have disagreements with each other from time to time. But we might not anticipate conflict over parenting styles. If you’re feeling conflicted about how your spouse parents your children, what can you do? Different Parenting Styles Can Be Beneficial It’s tempting to harbor hard feelings or information we don’t want our spouse to hear. We don’t want to experience the fallout, so we hold back. But when we don’t address issues that bother us, that leads to…

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