All Posts By

Drs. Les and Leslie Parrott

Mar 11
Love0
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How to Master Multiple Love Languages

By Communication No Comments

Is it possible to master multiple Love Languages™? We’ve discussed the idea that everyone experiences their Love Languages in unique ways. For instance, two individuals can have Words of Affirmation as their primary Love Language. But depending on personality and preferences, affirming words must be delivered in specific ways to resonate. For instance, an introvert might not appreciate publicly broadcast affirmations, but an extrovert would love that. A surface understanding of Love Languages isn’t enough to truly meet one another’s needs. We need to invest time and effort in fine-tuning them for each other. If that’s the case, how is…

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Mar 04
Love0
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My Spouse Has “Selective Hearing.” What Do I Do?

By Communication No Comments

Does your spouse tune you out? Selective hearing is a common issue among married couples. Maybe your spouse only hears what they want to hear. It’s frustrating to realize your communication only seems to land occasionally. You might want to talk to your spouse about certain topics, interactions, or events they’re not interested in. Or, you might have a honey-do list you’d like them to complete. The problem is, they always seem to tune you out. So what can you do? Is Your Spouse Deliberately Tuning You Out? First, consider whether your spouse is deliberately tuning you out. It’s true…

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Feb 25
Love0
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Help! How Can I Fill My Spouse’s Low Love Tank?

By Marriage No Comments

If your spouse’s love tank is low, how do you refill it? Everyone has an emotional reservoir we like to call a “love tank.” Each person’s tank needs the right fuel, and what that fuel is can change from one season to the next. The love tank varies from person to person, depending on your individual life experiences and needs. The longer you’re with your spouse, the better you’ll understand their love tank, and vice versa. It’s crucial to understand how their love tank works, what causes it to empty, and how you can fill it back up again. Let’s…

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Feb 18
Love0
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Lost in Translation: When Your Spouse’s Love Language Doesn’t Land

By Marriage One Comment

What do you do when your spouse doesn’t respond to their Love Language™? If you’re familiar with Dr. Gary Chapman’s 5 Love Languages®, you might already know your spouse’s Love Language™. Maybe you even feel fluent in your spouse’s primary languages. But what happens when your spouse doesn’t respond the way you hoped? To quickly recap (or get you up to speed) the 5 Love Languages are: Acts of Service Receiving Gifts Quality Time Words of Affirmation Physical Touch We tend to naturally lean toward two primary Love Languages, which fill our “Love Tank” and help us feel fulfilled in…

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Feb 11
Love0
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My Spouse Loves Valentine’s Day, But I Don’t. Should I Change?

By Marriage No Comments

Valentine’s Day is almost here, and maybe it’s not your favorite holiday. If your spouse loves to celebrate Valentine’s Day, but you don’t, what’s the solution? Should you change, or should your spouse just get used to how you feel? Some people see Valentine’s Day as the commercialization of love. They might feel the holiday obligates them to do something special or romantic. Others might have unpleasant memories from childhood associated with Valentine’s Day. Regardless of your reasons, you’re not alone. Still, part of being married is making compromises for one another. If your spouse truly loves Valentine’s Day, then…

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Feb 04
Love0
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How Can I Stop My Spouse From Interrupting Conversations?

By Communication, Marriage One Comment

Is your spouse a chronic interruptor? Do you dread talking on the phone when your spouse is nearby? Does your spouse tend to jump in the middle of your conversations—or worse, dominate them? And does that interruption derail your chat entirely, or force an end to the original interaction? Interrupting conversations is Control Freak behavior. Even if it’s a seemingly small quirk among your spouse’s many good qualities, it’s worth addressing. While you want to avoid becoming controlling too, there are a few things you can do to call your spouse’s attention to the problem. Before we move on, let’s…

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Jan 28
Love0
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Should I Point Out My Spouse’s Weird Quirks?

By Marriage No Comments

If your spouse’s quirks bother you, should you point them out? Can you ask your spouse to change the things that irritate you? In marriage, we share a level of intimacy that can sometimes seem a bit invasive. It’s almost like living with a mirror that reflects how others perceive and receive us. Being oblivious to that can feel blissful, because we don’t have to understand or process how our quirks come across to others. Maybe your spouse is blissfully unaware of how agitated you are. They might have a habit that’s embarrassing in public, like smacking gum at dinner,…

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Jan 21
Love0
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My Spouse Let Their Appearance Go. What Can I Say?

By Marriage No Comments

What happens when your spouse stops caring for their appearance as they once did? For many people, physical attractiveness is an incredibly important part of romantic relationships. Though we grow and change together over the course of marriage, we want to remain attracted to one another. When your spouse’s appearance changes, it can be distressing. Maybe you’re missing that aspect of the person you fell in love with. You might even be feeling less physically attracted to your spouse. And you might worry that this isn’t just a phase, and it will last indefinitely. Is there anything you can say…

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Jan 14
Love0
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Help! I Need My Spouse To Pay Attention When I Speak

By Communication No Comments

There’s little more frustrating than struggling to keep your spouse’s attention. You want them to listen. You need them to hear what you have to say. After all, you offer them that courtesy. Yet it seems that every time you try to tell them something important, their attention drifts. Maybe they’re chronically busy at work, or they have a lot on their mind. They could simply have a distractible personality. Either way, you find yourself increasingly annoyed — and you need something to change fast. There’s an important thing to remember: Whether your husband or wife struggles to pay attention,…

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Jan 07
Love0
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How Can I Convince My Spouse To Quit A Horrible Job?

By Careers 2 Comments

Can you convince your spouse to quit a terrible job? Many circumstances can create a miserable work environment. Changes in management, mistreatment, poor working conditions, and high-conflict situations can transform a once-satisfying job into a nightmare. Maybe you’ve watched this scenario unfold—and seen your spouse grow increasingly frustrated. The problem is, as bad as things are at work, your spouse won’t quit. You’ve tried everything to convince them it’s okay. All you want is to see them happier again, and in a better situation. Why would they want to stay at that job when they’re being mistreated? Fear of the…

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