My husband is an adrenaline junkie. How do I get him to slow down without quenching his personality?
So your spouse is addicted to adrenaline–something that research has proven to be a biological tendency in some people. You might be uncomfortable with your spouse’s propensity for high-speed, risky activities. But it’s important to understand that you’re probably never going to change his or her basic need for speed and risk-taking.
We all have different energy levels, and different activities and experiences that excite us. These preferences–needs, even–are built into the very fabric of our being. You want to respect who your spouse is, while still maintaining some sense of security that your husband or wife is doing everything in their power to protect themselves.
How do you strike a win-win balance in your life when your spouse is an adrenaline junkie? That’s what we’re going to be talking about in today’s video.
There are several steps you can take together to ensure a greater chance of your spouse’s safety without totally squashing his or her need for adrenaline. It’s a good idea for you to put your heads together and agree on which activities are too dangerous–in other words, decide what things aren’t worth the risk, and agree to avoid them.
A great way to reach a win-win scenario is to approach your spouse like this: “I know you love ________. I know it’s a part of your being. But I’m asking you to be safe. Here’s what I want.” Then, communicate the precautions you want your spouse to take, in order to feel more secure about his or her chosen activity.
To the adrenaline-junkie spouses out there: when we marry someone (and especially if and when we become parents), it’s important to realize that we’re no longer responsible only for ourselves; we now have spouses and children depending on us. It’s critical to them for us to stay alive and well.
If we truly love one another, we’ll allow ourselves to be influenced by our spouse’s genuine concern for our well-being. Our activities are not totally our choice when we have a family depending on us to stay alive.
Is your spouse an adrenaline junkie? Are you the spouse with the need for speed? How have you worked together to find a win-win? We’d love to hear from you!