Banking Together: Our Money or His and Hers?

By August 19, 2016February 22nd, 2018Conflict

Is it a good idea for couples to have separate bank accounts?

Unfortunately, this isn’t a question we can answer for every couple, across the board. Every couple is different, so the answer will depend on you and your spouse.

When it comes to money and bank accounts, each spouse needs to have some measure of freedom, autonomy, and choice when it comes to how the two of you handle your finances.

In today’s video, we’re discussing the heavy topic of money in marriage.

We’ve seen some couples successfully keep separate bank accounts because that’s what worked for their relationship. Each spouse is responsible for certain bills, and they’re open and accountable to one another. Some couples only discuss expenses that are above a certain amount–maybe $100 for some, and $1,000 for others.

For some couples, having separate bank accounts absolutely will not work. Maybe one or both of you just doesn’t have the level of accountability needed to maintain more than one account.

One major downside to keeping separate bank accounts is that the more you have separate, the easier it is to create secrets. You may not be trying to, but it could still easily happen. And money is such a loaded issue that full disclosure is paramount to minimizing potential conflicts.

All couples have to work together to find the right balance of freedom, shared ownership, responsibility, and accountability. Sit down together and discuss the options you have for maintaining your money. Don’t go into the discussion with an agenda; instead, keep it as open to possibilities and you can.

Most importantly, be sure you’re on the same team, working together to achieve the best possible outcome for your marriage.

Do you and your spouse keep separate bank accounts, or just one? How have you navigated the issue? Let us know in the comments.

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2 Comments

  • Gina says:

    My husband and I have one joint bank account. This occurred right after got engaged because my husband wanted help getting his finances on track. It has been tricky at times to navigate the subject of money, but we work together as a team.

  • Adam says:

    Yes. It is easy to answer. Money is part of oneness. The two should never have separate accounts and most certainly one spouse should not be “giving an allowance” to another spouse as though they were a hired servant. Scripture does not support separate financial decision making in the oneness household.

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