All Posts By

Drs. Les and Leslie Parrott

Jul 26
Love23

Help! My Spouse Wants Me to Make More Money

By Careers, Communication, Conflict 17 Comments

You’ve weighed your career decisions, filtered your values and what’s most important to you, and decided on a job that will help you not only bring in a good income, but also balance those values and pursuits in the best possible way for your family–or so you thought. Suddenly, you’re getting outside pressure from your spouse to up your game…and you’re not sure where it’s coming from. Money is a hot-button issue in most marriages, but the it tends to really hit a nerve where individual income is concerned. Whether one or both spouses is working, it’s not uncommon for…

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Jul 19
Love26

7 Ways to Seek Peace First in Your Marriage

By Communication 14 Comments

“If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.” – Romans 12:18 (NIV) Being a peacemaker isn’t easy. It’s not the passive existence of “keeping the peace,” or keeping your mouth shut to avoid confrontation. Instead, it’s an intentional, active state of existence that requires you to make careful–and sometimes difficult–decisions regarding the state of your relationship. Seeking and creating peace requires courage and fortitude. Resolving conflict is marriage is difficult; because it can be so tricky to navigate, many couples find that unresolved issues and hurts begin to accumulate over time. In…

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Jul 12
Love20

5 Ways Empathy Can Neutralize Conflict with Your Spouse

By Communication 4 Comments

Empathy is defined as the identification with and understanding of another’s situation, feelings, and motives. It’s a critical component to success in all types of relationships, but it’s particularly valuable in marriage, a place where peace and harmony are paramount to success. Practicing empathy can effectively neutralize conflict and restore peace to your marriage. Here are 5 ways being empathic toward your spouse can benefit you both and nurture lifelong love. 1. Empathy opens your eyes to another point of view. When you empathize with a person, you put yourself in their shoes. You’re able to view things from their…

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Jul 05
Love20

For Better or For Worse: Dealing With Tough Times in Marriage

By Communication, Conflict 34 Comments

“More marriages might survive if the partners realized that sometimes the better comes after the worse.” – Anonymous If you and your spouse know how to navigate the tough times in your marriage, you’ll come out on the other side closer than ever before. Hard times and conflict are inevitable–they’re just a part of life. When you overcome those times together, that can really deepen your sense of partnership. Whether you’re dealing with internal conflicts (disagreement or stalemate, infidelity, health crises, mental illness, etc.) or external conflicts (loss, tragedy, job stress or loss, family or in-law issues, etc.), you’re going…

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Jun 28
Love21

10 Reasons to be Happy With Yourself Before You Marry

By Self Reflection 7 Comments

“Love can come when you’re already who you are, when you’re filled with you. Not when you look to someone else to fill the empty space.” – Deb Caletti It’s exciting to dream of the future, especially when you’re dreaming of finding the right person, dating, falling in love, getting married, and living happily ever after. But we often find ourselves wanting to rush the process and get straight to the marriage part. And even though marriage is amazing, it is best experienced when two well-rounded individuals–who know themselves well and are happy with who they are–choose to share their…

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Jun 21
Love81

It’s Not Me, It’s You: Why Criticism Poisons Happy Marriages

By Communication, Conflict 244 Comments

“People tend to criticize their spouse most loudly in the area where they themselves have the deepest emotional need.” – Gary Chapman Criticism is an insidious behavior that comes into our marriage and eats at the core of our identity. Few things will shut down intimacy quite like being criticized or controlled, and it is capable of immobilizing your emotional health and personal growth, especially within your relationship. Nobody enjoys being criticized or picked apart, but it’s especially painful when your spouse–your soul mate–is the one being critical and hurtful to you. It’s demoralizing to be treated this way when…

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Jun 14
Love22

3 Reasons Radical Forgiveness is a Must in Marriage

By Communication, Conflict 10 Comments

It has been said that marriage is the combination of two very good forgivers. We have found this to be true in our own marriage–many times over! And we’ve observed countless successful relationships that were made up of good forgivers, as well. When you’re in such a close relationship with another human being, it’s inevitable that you’re going to step on each other’s toes. That’s just part of life. The trick is being able to offer forgiveness to one another in a genuine, meaningful way, so that when those times come, you’ll be ready to face them head-on. But What…

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Jun 07
Love35

21 Ways to Love the Person You Married

By Communication 16 Comments

“Happy marriages begin when we marry the ones we love, and they blossom when we love the ones we marry.” – Tom Mullen It’s easy to fall in love and to marry the person you’ve fallen for; it’s a much bigger endeavor to nurture that love for a lifetime. The good news is, it can definitely be done! We’ve created a list of 21 ways to love the one you married. Put even a few of these into motion, and you’ll see your relationship continue to blossom and thrive over the years together. Let’s jump in! 1. Offer your undivided…

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May 31
Love30

Gimme My Space: The Importance of Respecting Your Spouse’s Individuality

By Communication, Self Reflection, Time 7 Comments

“Don’t smother each other. No one can grow in the shade.” – Leo Buscaglia When you’re in the early years of your relationship–namely, dating and the “honeymoon period” of your marriage–it’s easy to lose yourself in one another. Many couples want to spend every possible moment together, and are even willing to lay aside their individual interests or activities during that time. The differences between you and your spouse tend to be glossed over, too, and those differences don’t feel like a big deal at first. Eventually, you might find that once you’ve settled into marriage, your spouse might not…

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May 24
Love42

10 Ways to Show Gratitude to Your Spouse

By Communication 36 Comments

“Gratitude can transform common days into Thanksgivings, turn routine jobs into joy, and change ordinary opportunities into blessings.” – Les Parrott Showing gratitude to your spouse is an important daily practice; it’s essential to nurturing a healthy marriage. There are many ways to express your thanks to your husband or wife, so today, we’re sharing 10 ideas for showing him or her your appreciation. 1.  Say it out loud…and more often! Intentionally saying thank you to your spouse more often is the simplest, most obvious way to show him or her your gratitude. It can be easy to neglect to…

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